Here it goes: 2014.

I could sit here and drum up a cliché to sum up my 2013. But I won't.

Mostly because I actually can't. This past year has been a whirlwind of emotions that I can't quite explain. I endured a lot of growth, but while I grew in several aspects of my life, I also took a few steps back in others.

Life is all about balance (as a Libra, I'm a firm believer in it). And for as long as I live, I will try my hardest to achieve a happy balance. I'm a realist - I know it's impossible to be perfect, even if I may act like it's my ultimate goal.

I still have a lot to learn about myself and the world. And I'm blessed to have reached this point of my life. 2014 will begin a brand new chapter of my life. I'm going to graduate college and (with any hope) find a job. I am forced to grow up and I'm absolutely terrified. I tell people I am itching to leave school, but to be honest I actually don't want to leave. At least not yet. I finally found a comfort in college and now I am forced to leave in a couple of months.

Anyways. As much as I am scared for the future, I'm excited to turn the page from 2013. It wasn't a horrible year, but I am ready to better myself and to change all the things about me that I didn't like from this passing year.

Ultimately, I want to right my wrongs. I know that this time of the year generally calls for "letting go" and "putting things in the past," but sometimes doing those things feels like I'm going to have unfinished business. For proper closure, I know that I have to make amends and learn from them. I've learned that I am not close to being at peace with myself and I need to think critically about the person I want to be.

But that being said, I also need to be more open and to say "yes" more often. I get caught up in my own naiveté way too often, and I need to take a few more risks with no worry of rejection. I do myself a great disservice by treating myself as if I'm still 15. I'm going to make mistakes and I'm going to be shut down (a lot of both happened in 2013 anyways), and that is perfectly okay. I'm still standing now, surely that counts for something?

Words are strong - and they are arguably the strongest weapons I can ever wield. But the thing is, I don't have to use them as weapons. I can use them for guidance, for love, for peace. I have a tendency to be harsh, and thinking before speaking is so vital in being a mature adult. A few seconds between my thoughts wouldn't hurt, and may even help with managing my inner peace. I want to be a kinder person. I want to be someone who is more compassionate and giving. I want to leave a positive impact, not a mean-spirited one. I am fortunate to have opportunities which allow me to curate positivity, and I cannot waste them.

I hope that with the new year I can find clarity within myself and hopefully extend that clarity to the world around me.

Grazing.

I love food. That's basically the understatement of the century. In relation to food, I especially love snacking. I honestly cannot go an hour without eating something. I constantly need some food on hand or else I turn into a little five year-old diva and get ridiculously cranky and tired. What are three well-portioned meals anyways?

Unfortunately, I tend to eat too much of the good things. And by good, I actually mean bad. Which are snacks like chips, candy and anything doused in chocolate. Chocolate can be good, but just like everything else, only in moderation.

Graze is a food delivery service that originally started in the UK, but is slowly bringing their services stateside. They specialize in healthy, but delicious snacks that can be shipped to your door however often you'd like, starting on a weekly basis. Think Birchbox, but with granola and trail mix.

I was curious about this and signed up to get an invite a couple of months ago. Since the company is gradually expanding, sign-ups are limited for now. Luckily for me I got my invitation a couple of days ago and my first Graze box is on the way to my house. When you sign up for Graze, you simply choose which snacks you'd be interested in trying and they'll pick out the snacks for your box based on your ratings.

I've been thinking of getting more creative with my snacking choices, so hopefully the Graze picks will inspire me to make some of the snacks myself. I started an internship recently, so the perfectly portioned  Graze snacks are great to pack for the office.

With a little help.

As my third year of college comes to a close, my mind is cluttered with things that have absolutely nothing to do with final exams-- macaron baking, room organizing, and (future) baby naming.

And then my mind does its usual pondering and reflecting on the past year, the past three years, and just life in general.

It was never easy (and still isn't easy) but sometimes I wonder how I made it this far. Maybe I don't give myself enough credit, but something has to be said about how I've soldiered on when I didn't feel like soldiering on any more.

After three years of big-girl school, I've truly come to realize what is really important when burgeoning into young adulthood. I know so many young woman, from my family, from friends and from beyond that are entering that seemingly terrible reality that is high school and college. I can see the same vulnerability in them that I had when I was younger. Quite frankly, I'm still rather vulnerable myself. And I'm working it.

When these girls ask for advice or for any reassurance that everything is going to be okay, I usually am at a loss. When my life isn't as I hope it to be, am I one to be giving advice? How can I tell someone that everything is going to be okay when I'm still trying to convince myself the same thing?

I will say, however, one thing. If I have learned anything from the last few months of high school until now, it's that you truly are the company you keep. Surround yourself with positive people. I don't mean perky, always-has-a-super-creepy-smile kind of positive. I mean people who have good hearts, with genuine passions, with a sense of purpose. Be around individuals whom can push you to be the best you can be. Not necessarily perfect people (because let's be real, those don't exist), but people whom you can learn from. Whether it is geometry, how to properly wear black and navy together, or just...how to be a good friend.

The wonderful people you befriend will help you grow into the person you want to be, and you can be a wonderful friend to them as well. The friends you make in college and beyond should aspire to inspire, and you will be a much better person from it.

Oops!

I have been really bad at this blogging thing. So much for constant updates about London, right?

With a little over a month left here (!!!), I do not want to leave the UK with any regrets, which includes my unintentional abandonment of this blog.

I lot has happened since I last posted, and my goal is to share some of my stories (hopefully all of them) before I actually leave. As midterm work is piling on, my mind is muddled with stress, as well as many moments of self-reflection. I do think about home often, but now that London is my second home I can't bare the thought of leaving soon.

The stories will come, the adventures in and out of London will be shared. Just as soon as I finish this powerpoint presentation.

My Neighborhood: South Kensington

South Kensington, London

South Kensington, my neck of the woods for the next few months, is known to be one of the poshest neighborhoods in all of England. And I must say, at first I did feel rather "out of place" living in this area. When does a naive college student ever feel "at home" amongst diplomats and businessmen? Regardless, I absolutely adore the neighborhood. When I'm not passing by immaculate and grand row-homes or foreign embassies, I'm walking around prim private schools for uniform-clad children. Every afternoon there are always young students skipping down the Mercedes-gilded streets.

And to top it all off, some of the most beautiful and world-renowned museums in London are just a couple of blocks away. I'm very much so a museum geek, so I can totally imagine myself spending a quiet day at one of the museums, just enriching my mind while simultaneously taking a breather (which I think I will need quite often here).

Greetings from Londontown!

I honestly don't know where to start. I have been in London for almost a week and reality hasn't kicked in yet. I pass by foreign embassies and gorgeous, column-clad homes (which probably house diplomats and wealthy businessman) in South Kensington every day, and it really hasn't fazed me. And I'll certainly have to get used to all this, since I will be a London resident until December. Scary!

Although I have traveled outside of the country before, I don't think studying in London will be anything like those summer trips to France. Not only am I living here for the next few months, but I am thrown into a whirlpool with people I don't even know. And for a shy little bug like me...this is the most frightening part. I seldom get homesick (except for my dog), but I'm hardly a social butterfly. The whole experience is intimidating and I'm hoping I find the strength in me to continue on. I am thrilled to be in such a beautiful city and I hope that this will be one of the greatest experiences in my life.

I've been meaning to start blogging about my experiences last week, but everything has been thrown at me in hyper-speed that I couldn't keep up. I'm hoping that I can frequently update this blog with my experiences, from my day-to-day happenings to my own reflections on English culture. And from the looks of it, I have a lot of catching up to do!

Until the next post!

Cleanse.

I've been on summer vacation for about six weeks now. And like other summers, I haven't accomplished much at this point of my break. I spent a few days visiting my parents in Houston, but I wouldn't say this summer has been very productive so far. If I'm not spending hours on my feet at my retail job, I'm tidying up the house (read: trying), watching basically whatever is on TV, or more recently, dragging myself with the utmost strength doing the aforementioned because I am sick. Who gets sick in 90 degree weather anyways?

I should have started summer a little better. Maybe I could have started baking cakes again, read more books, even making bracelets. Truthfully my mind has been elsewhere and I hate having these kind of emotional distractions. So what's a girl to do?

Food poisoning, along with a few pounding migraines, a couple more upset stomachs and some body aches and nerve-chilling shivers later, it's evident that my formula for a planned summer isn't working. Clearly I need to take better care of myself, and with any hope, a "better" me can create all the motivation needed to get everything done that needs to be dealt with this summer.

I could start by eating better (step one: actually eat something), perhaps fitting in some exercise a couple days a week (unsurprisingly, being a couch potato can really cramp up my muscles), and creating a better living environment (the bedroom needs some Swiffer plus more). I sit here and ponder what I'm going to do next and I can't come to a definitive choice on where to begin. But I did eat a yogurt for breakfast this morning. Progress?